Will Gullible Audiophiles Buy Absolutely ANYTHING?

Filed under: Home Audio



There is certainly no shortage of “tweak” devices designed to separate audiophiles from their money by offering the promise of huge gains in sound quality. Some prime examples are the $200 Shakti Audio “Electromagnetic Stabilizer Stone” which sits on top of a line conditioner or transformer and is said to use proprietary noise reduction circuitry to absorb RF and EMI noise and dissipate them as heat, the $125/pr Creative Cable Concepts “Pigtails” which are designed to eliminate “Back-EMF”, a supposed distortion caused by the backward movement of cone and dome drivers by connecting to the positive terminal on a speaker, and the $1800 Furutech DeMag, which demagnetizes CDs and DVDs, cables, and somehow, vinyl LPs.

When it comes to shameless hucksterism and pure snake-oil though, none of these products or companies can even hold a candle to Machina Dynamica. Their products and their performance claims are so transparently ridiculous that it beggars belief.

Let’s start with the “Tru-Tone” electrical outlet cover, an “audiophile grade” outlet cover made with proprietary materials and processing techniques which “produce a remarkably powerful, detailed and focused sound.” Machina Dynamica recommends using at least three or four of them (and of course there’s the accompanying package deal, four for just $99!) on your outlets, including outlets with nothing plugged in to them.

It gets worse, far worse. The “Brilliant Pebbles” is, quite literally, a plastic bag filled with rocks. It is of course made with a number of “highly-specialized, proprietary techniques are used for preparation/assembly”, and is claimed to act as a “vibration ‘node damper’ and EMI/RFI absorber depending on size/application via atomic mechanisms in the crystal structures.” Machina Dynamica offers several different sizes of bags and rocks, with prices ranging from $39 to $159. There’s even a “white paper” on the Brilliant Pebbles, full of strings of words which make absolutely no sense.

There’s also the “Clever Little Clock”, a cheapie travel alarm clock (you won’t know what kind it is until you receive it in the mail) which has been modified with more of Machina Dynamica’s proprietary techniques. They set it from the “factory”; you aren’t even supposed to set the time. It runs on “special batteries” (which Machina Dynamica will replace for you when they run out, regular Duracells “won’t work”). What are you supposed to do with it? Just stick it somewhere in the room, and it will transform the sound of your system with its magic power. The clocks are apparently so clever that in order to test your system without them, you must “place the Clock outside the house structure, for example on the front steps -- but NOT in a drawer, closet, another room, basement or garage OR the family car.” The Clever Little Clock is an absolute bargain at just $199, especially considering the glowing review and award it received from Positive Feedback.

The product that jumps the shark, the most ridiculous of them all, is the “Teleportation Tweak”. You call Machina Dynamica on either a landline or cell phone, and they play a series of clicks and beeps for about 30 seconds. Machina Dynamic will transmit their sound magic over the phone, transforming your system, for just $60. There’s no physical product at all. 30 seconds of FAX modem noises, over the phone, for $60. It’s enough to make a Bose or Monster Cable marketer’s head explode. All of this would be very funny if no one actually fell for this stuff, but they do. Machina Dynamica has racked up over 750 sales on Audiogon alone. In an answer to my own question, will gullible audiophiles buy absolutely anything? Sadly, yes.